Murders to Music: Crime Scene to Music Scene (Streamline Events and Entertainment)
Come on a ride along with a Veteran Homicide Detective as the twists and turns of the job suddenly end his career and nearly his life; discover how something wonderful is born out of the Darkness. Embark on the journey from helping people on their worst days, to bringing life, excitement and smiles on their best days.
Murders to Music: Crime Scene to Music Scene (Streamline Events and Entertainment)
SnapShot: Purpose, Direction, Blessings and the Future of Murders to Music
The turning point arrived unexpectedly during a therapy session when discussing the growth of this podcast. After years of exposing my deepest wounds, sharing every secret, and crying more times than I can count, I realized I've reached a crossroads in my healing journey – and so has this show.
When I began Murders to Music, I believed that God gave me pain for a purpose: to discuss the lessons in life nobody wants to address. Through transparency and vulnerability, we've explored the darkest corners of trauma, PTSD, mental health struggles, and suicidal ideation. I've been in those devastating places – gun in mouth, completely hopeless – but that's not where my story ends. The hundreds of therapy sessions, the EMDR treatments, the toolbox of coping strategies – they've all contributed to my gradual emergence from darkness into light.
This revelation doesn't mean abandoning our commitment to difficult conversations. Rather, it's about expanding our perspective to include the hope that follows despair. I think of Steve Redmond from Seattle PD, who poured light into my soul in 2012 when I needed it most, only to lose his own battle with PTSD ten years later. His story reminds me that sharing only the darkness does us all a disservice. Sometimes, finding light is simply about changing your perspective – as a worship leader once told me, "You're not far from God, he's right behind you. All you have to do is turn around." Join me as this podcast evolves to honor both the pain of our struggles and the promise of what comes next. Connect with me at murders2music on Instagram or email – I want you to be part of this conversation as we move forward together.
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Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to a Murders to Music Snapshot. So this last week a couple weeks ago now I was in therapy and we were talking about this podcast and we were talking about the growth and the wave of growth that we've had and that was pretty cool and I know my therapist listens to a lot of the podcasts that I do, you know and it's kind of a cheat to win situation for her because she'll listen to them and that gives her an idea as to where I'm at mentally, so when I come in she'll know what she's walking into, or at least what I'm walking into. So we were talking and she asked me about the podcast and where I wanted it to go and what my plans were for it, and I told her. I said, well, you know, I said I really think that God gave me um when I started this podcast and it was to talk about the lessons in life that nobody else wants to. And we do that through being transparent, vulnerable and exposing our soft white underbellies. And we talk about the topics that nobody else really wants to discuss the feeling of weakness, ptsd, mental health, depression, suicide, the effects that life has on all of us, whether you're a cop or not, but it's the things that we want to pretend that don't exist. We want to put a smile on our face and we just want to push through life and pretend like things aren't there, and when we're surrounded by our people and our friends and family, we just hide behind this facade. And I said I think that God gave me pain for a purpose and he gave me something, a message that I could share and help others with, and that is what this podcast is all about.
Speaker 1:I've cried on this podcast more than once and I've told every secret that I have on this podcast, and so I said but where I'm at now, I feel like I'm in such a better place. There's been so much progress over the last two years years since I've been doing this podcast, but over the last couple of years of therapy, I feel like I'm blessed. I've took such an introspective look at myself and the situation and figured out what is a real problem, what is not. Where am I to blame for some of these problems? Where are others to blame? What silver lining can I find from these problems that I've had, or these issues that I've ran into or up against, or these headwinds I've ran into over the last couple of years. What is God's purpose? Why does he have me where I'm at right now, in this time? What does he need me to do or want me to do here? I'm here for a reason and in looking through all of that and processing all of that information, it's like I'm ready to move on to the second part of this journey, the second part of this podcast, or from darkness to light. You know I've shared a lot about the darkness and the lessons learned, but I also want to share about the transition and the light and the blessings that have come from this.
Speaker 1:And so often we get so caught up in the moment of darkness at least I do. I get so caught up in that moment of darkness that I feel like there is no light at the end of the tunnel, there is no light tomorrow. And I've been places where I've been totally devastated down, depressed, dark, suicidal gun in my mouth. I've been in those places and to think that I am now, have worked through it, and it's not just like I've taken a magic pill and the magic pills made me feel better and I'm like, oh just, life is good and rainbows and butterflies. That's not it. I've got the hard work to show for it. I have got the pain and the hard work and the crying and the therapy and the hundreds of sessions underneath my belt and the tools in the toolbox and the EMDR and everything else that has helped me progress to where I'm at right now.
Speaker 1:And I'm not saying that there won't be a rough tomorrow. There will be ups and downs. We all know that. These triggers come and go and all of a sudden you could be cruising along in life and things are great and then you hit a roadblock, you've stubbed your toe and the next thing you know, your world is upside down again and you have to readjust and realign and I understand that. But where I'm at right now, like I said a moment ago, I feel like that weight has been lifted off. I feel like there's a new message looking forward. I want to shed light and brightness and happiness where it can be shed. I would be doing all of us an injustice and a disservice if I just focused on the negative and the negative path. I think there needs to be hope. There needs to be hope in a message that there is a better tomorrow.
Speaker 1:I know when I was in my darkest hours. I would have loved to have had hope that there was a better tomorrow when I met Steve Redmond, seattle Police Department, who I did the snapshot on last week or a couple weeks ago now. Steve Redmond shared his light of hope with me at that mental health conference when he shared his story about PTSD and survival and getting back on the track of life. Now it's very unfortunate that in 2022, december 31st, steve killed himself. He lost his battle. He met me in 2012, and, out of a sea of 400 people in his audience, he spoke and poured life into my soul.
Speaker 1:Something happened between 2012 and 2022, a 10-year span where he spiraled and got to the darkest moment of his life and this time actually pulled the trigger. I don't know what happened or what occurred, and I wish I could have been there for him. I wish I could have been there in the final moment to help him like he helped me, but I know that when he poured that light into my soul in 2012, it gave me hope of a better tomorrow. It gave me hope of a better future, and that is what I want to do. I want to focus on the lessons that God has given me the pain, but I also want to focus on the lessons that God has given me. The pain, but I also want to focus on the blessings that are in the future.
Speaker 1:So you may start to see a transition in this podcast from dark to light. It's always been there, but I may start focusing more on the lighter side of life and the blessings and the good stuff that's coming from it and bringing guests on the show that have a story to tell, that we can tell their story because we learned so much by listening to other people's stories. We can hear their story, but I need to make sure that it's the right stories. You know what I mean. I want to make sure that it's worthy of why we have this podcast and this platform in front of us. But when I find those guests, I want them to be able to tell their story and tell the positive and how it has affected them. And I get it. Not everything ends with a silver bow and a happy shining star. I get that. I've had those stories on this show and will continue to go there.
Speaker 1:But everybody's message I want there to be a purpose in it. I want there to be something learned. I want it to be educational, entertaining or provide value through transparency and vulnerability. That is the message for the show. So when I'm talking to my therapist about this, she says, have you written a purpose statement for your show? And I'm like I haven't. You know, I just kind of jumped on board and started doing it and she's like, well, maybe if you wrote a purpose statement, this would help you. And as I'm talking about this right now, like everything I've just said to you kind of sounds like a purpose statement, but I'm going to work on my purpose statement and we'll see, kind of, where this show goes. I I want to encourage others that there is, there is always a silver lining right around the corner.
Speaker 1:2012, when I was 2013, when I was in really bad shape, I had walked away from the church, I had separated myself, I had been playing worship there and I got kicked off the worship team because I was making some poor choices and just wasn't in a place where I needed to be up front leading. And I remember I got into this argument with the worship leader because I wanted to play and my approach was as long as I have church and I'm playing there, then you know, at least I have something good going for me and he's like you can't be up here leading people when your life is soiled and falling apart. And I didn't get it. But during that conversation he said Aaron. He said you know what? And I said uh. I said his name's Paul. I said Paul. I said I am so far from God right now. I am so distracted, I am so far away from him. And he's like Aaron, you're not far away from God, he's right behind you. All you have to do is turn around and ask him to be a part of your life again and he will be there the moment you ask. And I've never forgotten that approach. You know, I've never forgotten that idea that there's always positivity, there's always light right behind you. You just may have to turn and look from a different angle. So that's what you guys can expect on this show. I hope you like it. I hope you're loving it.
Speaker 1:You guys can always reach out to me at murders2music at gmailcom Murders, the number two music at gmailcom. Hit me up on Instagram at murders2music. Find me, follow me there, send me some messages. Become a part of this conversation. You guys, you look me up online. Streamline Events and Entertainment. My phone number is there, give me a call, always happy to talk. I want you guys to be a part of this conversation. Love you guys so much. Hopefully you guys are excited for the future of the show. I know I am. I can't wait to get it out there. Ladies and gentlemen, that is a Murders to Music snapshot.
